Things She Never Said
by Color Me Tardis
Summary: Lisa Cuddy refuses to say one thing out of fear.


A/N: Ok, I have major writers block but my muse is wild. It wants to write but I have absolutely no idea what to write about. This came to me while I was listening to Spring Awakening, the song Touch Me. It was supposed to turn out different so maybe I'll do a different one later but here for now (: It's a one-shot.

Things She Never Said

It wasn't as if she had never fallen in love before, it wasn't as if she had never loved whether it be real or fake. However, she had never loved like she was at the moment. There had never been feelings so deep in her chest that she felt like her heart was being clamped and pressed until it exploded. She had never felt so many butterflies fluttering around in her stomach, fluttering so fast that she thought she was going to be sick. Why was she just realizing this now?

"You didn't know?" The man across from her asked, leaning forwards and breaking her from her thoughts. "You've known this person for the longest of times and you never realized you had an inkling of a feeling towards-"

"No. I didn't realize." She muttered, looking at her cleaned nails. "I never once realized it until…I mean, after the divorce….I seemed to realize it more when I found there was more freedom." He was studying her face and she really wished he would stop. There was no need to have to find every single feeling she had at the moment.

"And so…you're confused? Is that the reason you've come here?" The woman nodded slowly and he smiled ever so slightly as he leaned back.

"I just…I'm…"

"Who is it, Lisa?" The therapist asked, tilting his head ever so slightly. "House?"

"Ha, no." Lisa nearly snorted before shaking her head. "It's…someone...I really can't say."

"And I can't help you." The woman shot her head up and blinked. "Lisa, you're not ready for help. You're barely admitting this to yourself. You can't even tell me who out of…embarrassment?"

"Not embarrassment…it's just my reputation. Even if one person knows…I won't be able to sleep. Look, can't you just offer me advice?"

"Stop with the reputation crap. This is completely confidential, Lisa! Yes, I work in your hospital and everything but…think about it. Have I ever told your secrets?" She shook her head. "I'll get in major trouble if I do, remember? You're not ready, though, if you can't even tell someone in pure confidence."

"Please, just give me some sort of advice. This person…won't be able…I can't…" She was at a complete loss of words.

"How much do you love this person?"

"Loads…so much more than I can ever describe." She sighed.

"Does this person like you back?"

"I don't know…it's…it's…"

"Lisa, calm yourself. Just say it aloud, you'll feel better."

"Stacy."

"Ah, I see why you're confused. Look, Lisa, I know you. I know you're going to say you aren't gay and that you're just in love with this one woman. Remember that infatuation plays a part in this. Go talk to her, tell her and get it over with."

"I can't…you're not the greatest at giving advice."

"I'm giving you perfect advice but I'm leaving out major holes. I can't tell you what to do, you have to make that choice but I can help you. Now go, our session is over. I want you to go talk to her."

"You really don't understand-"

"I understand perfectly. You're a chicken. Look, I know you two very well…she'll understand, even if she doesn't feel the same way. Now go, I'm done." Lisa stood, knowing there would be no more from the therapist to help her.

Sitting in her office was the woman she was dreading seeing.

"Stacy, what can I do for you?" Professional.

"I had something for you." Standing from the couch, Stacy held out an unsigned file. "I just need it to be signed." Lisa did as was needed and as Stacy was hesitantly walking towards the door, the other woman opened her mouth.

She wished she hadn't.

"Stacy, wait…I need to talk to you."

"About?" Stacy turned and tilted her head in a way that made Lisa want to grab her face and kiss her little pouted lips.

"Uh…" Stepping forwards slightly, Lisa opened her mouth again before looking away. "Never mind."

"No, no, you wanted to say something, what is it?"

"There's a conference meeting in three days you need to head to." Lisa mentally slapped herself…why couldn't she have said it? Maybe she would have if she had known what Stacy was thinking at the same time.

_I love you._


End file.
